Saturday, April 7, 2018

Day 284 - Shame Killer

Thoughts that have come from various quotes taken from the book, "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim Based Society" by John H. Hovis. Click here to link directly to the audio file.

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"I believe that understanding our place before God is the start of some personal healing that might help you too break the bonds in your life that have taken hold as a result of your attempts to cope with the cloud of shame you sometimes feel around you."

As quoted from the book "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim-Based Society" by John H. Hovis Page 61.

Our Bible reading is one we all need to take to heart. It says,

Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame.
    Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.
You will forget the shame of your youth
    and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood. Isaiah 54:4 (NIV)

I descried shame in our lives as being a cloud from time to time. When we are in a cloud, things are much more difficult to see. The fogginess that surrounds us when we are stuck in shame makes navigating this world a challenging and dangerous task. Just ask any sailor about navigating in fog. It is in those time when things are hard to see that we had better be paying the most attention or accidents will happen.

I have said this before but it is worth repeating. Shame is all about identity. Where guilt is the feeling we have when we have done something that we think is wrong, shame is thinking that we are bad because of the bad things we have done. It is when we let our identity be shaped or confirmed by things we do that victim thinking really takes hold in our lives.

Shame is all about condemnation. In Christ, there is no condemnation. That means believers should be in places where, when shame hits, they are able to quickly side step this obstacle to victor living. How do we get out of shame? I think the most powerful means of keeping shame in check is a proper view of who you are. That's where I have learned God has to be part of the picture.

You see, when I use anything other than God's view of me to define and confirm my identity, I'm setting myself up for that terrible feeling of shame. When I use things I can do to make me feel like a particular identity is possible, everything is OK until the things I do don't rise to the level needed to support that identity. The more the things I do seem to fail me, the more identity comes more into question. It is in those times when things that I do can bring shame into my life in ways God never intended.

When I am in a place where I understand God's view on identity, I can be a part of the process of defending my life from the debilitating effects of shame. It is when I stand in the faith of being a victor even when victory is far from my experience that shame becomes so much easier to deal with in my life. Failing to see my life the way God does makes it possible for my life to be influenced in ways that God never wanted to happen.

Our reading today starts with three important words. It says, "Don't be afraid..." Fear is what makes shame possible in the first place. It is when we are afraid that those we think are important in our lives might think less of us because of what we have done or failed to do that shame can play a role in our lives. That fear of what others think is what makes shame possible. Our reading today says, "Don't be afraid..."

We don't have to fear shame from God. He can't be ashamed of us. If He is, then Jesus' death was a total waste of time. Shame comes from the condemnation for the things we have done wrong. Jesus died to pay the penalty for all that we have done, are doing and will do wrong. If that is true, why would God feel shame and why would He condemn us? It was ALL paid for by Jesus' sacrifice. We can choose to live a life free of shame. Why aren't we living in that place more in our lives?

I believe it is because, deep down inside, we still believe that it is all up to us. We think we have to be the ones to create and maintain our identities. We think we have to be the ones to pay for all the badness that we might be tempted to allow in our lives. Those are the doors that let shame in. It is when we allow shame to shape our identity that victim thinking makes its presence knows all too well in our lives.

What's the answer to all this? Our reading has it right. It says "You will forget the shame of your youth..." We forget the shame of the past when we live in that place where shame doesn't exist. That's the place God's children are given the chance to live as they walk in their relationship with Him. It is when we let go of the past and let what God says about us be all we need for identity to be the power behind all we do, that shame moves to the background.

Our place before God is assured. We have every right to stand before this God that loves us. There is where He wants us to be. Nothing we have done or will do can change what He thinks about us. His thoughts have nothing to do with shame and condemnation. They have everything to do with relationship and love.

Step into the identity God has paid a high price for you to have today. Let your victor status destroy all the shame that this world will try to get you to take on as your day unfolds before you. 

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