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"It’s when we become so obsessed with finding the answer to “Why?” at all costs, that our lives can spiral into the pit that is victim thinking."
As quoted from the book "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim-Based Society" by John H. Hovis Page 140.
What are you obsessed about? My wife tells me my obsession is finishing things. There has been more than one time when she simply mentions, in passing, some issue left undone and just like that I have that thing done in no time. She let's people know that they shouldn't mention things that need to get done around me because I might make getting that thing done my mission.
You see it isn't necessarily a bad thing that I like to get things done. Personally I think the world could use a little more of us obsessed with getting things done. It is when my drive to get things done interferes with my important relationships or my personal health or my spiritual growth that even this good trait can be an enemy in my life.
Same goes with any obsession when it takes control of our lives. It is when we get so focused on that one thing that seems to grab our attention like no other that we tend to get way out of balance. So much so that victim thinking can take hold, especially when what we are obsessed on is something that is beyond our control in ways that make us feel like we just don't measure up.
This is particularly the case when we become obsessed with trying to find the reasons behind the challenging times that come against us. Being obsessed with finding out the answer to "Why?" when bad times hit can be a debilitating and victim thinking prospect. It is when the answer to the "Why?" times in our lives is slow in coming that our victor status is seriously jeopardized.
There was a King of Israel named David. He penned a good number of the Psalms in the Bible. I love how David was so real in his writings. He didn't hold back when it came to His conversations with God. David asked "Why?" of God more than once. Rightfully so. His life was filled with so many challenging times. Sure, David makes some pretty big mistakes that came with a package of consequences he had to deal with. Those situations David didn't seem to question God about. It was when those who should have known better had it out for David in life threatening ways that the question of "Why?" was directly put before God.
Today's reading is one such case. Check out how David boldly questions God during a particularly bad time in his life.
Why, Lord, do you stand far off? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble? Psalm 10:1 (NIV)
Now that's pretty honest. Whatever was happening in David's life made him feel like God had abandoned him. It was as though no matter how hard David looked for God, He seemed to be hiding from David at the time he needed God the most. Have you ever felt that way? I sure have. I kind of wish I had the guts or the insight to be as bold to ask of God "Why?" as clearly as David did.
Sometimes David was answered by God in ways that made him realize that God never left him. Other times God's presence seemed to be so absent that the question of "Why?" nearly drove David to the brink. Somehow David continued to believe that God's salvation was worth so much more than always getting the "Because!" to his "Why?" times. Even when David flirted with victim thinking as a result from being obsessed with finding the answer to his "Why?" he seemed to be able to let his victor status take over in ways that drove victim thinking away.
What made it possible for David to be able to return to his victor status even when his life had victim written all over it? I believe it is that David believed what God said about him. He let the God-given identity spoken over David's life be all that mattered. Even when the bad times hit, David seemed to just believe what God said about him and he didn't let his circumstances contradict God's words.
I love what God said about David. God described David as, "A man after God's own heart." Now that's a description of life that is powerfully deep. David wasn't after worldly riches. He wasn't after power or influence. He wanted to be able to understand and live out God's heart. Even when the bad times came, David knew he could speak to God openly and with a boldness that bordered on the irreverent. He even spoke to God with a little bit of indignation that some might say was dishonoring to God. Yet David never seemed to waiver on the fact that God was for Him even when it looked like God didn't seem to care about the terrible circumstances that David faced.
That's how I want to live life. I want to live life with a realness that allows me to be open and direct with God like David. I also want to live life with a belief in God's words over me in a way that says I know who I am no matter what this world does to try and rob me of my identity. Good news is that is exactly what God wants for me and for you as well. He wants us to live a life that includes just as much bold communication and steadfast belief as that lived out in David's life.
The truth is that the answers to the "Why?" questions we have in bad times really don't have a single thing to do with who we are. We are God's Child whether our circumstances are good or if they are bad. The good times don't prove who we are just as the bad times don't take away from our identity. Asking "Why?" isn't a bad thing unless we need the answer to better know who we are.
The "Because!" surrounding the bad times of our lives will never do anything to help us come to grips with who we are before this God that loves us so. What God says about us is all that matters when it comes to our status as a victor. If we look to our circumstances as proof as to the validity of God's words, victim thinking can't help but to be a part of our life.
Whatever your obsession in life might be, don't let it take you to places where you can't see God's heart. This is particularly the case with being obsessed with finding the answers to the "Why?" times in your life.
God has spoken. You are His Child. Nothing can change that. This world will never be able to give enough proof of this identity. Go ahead and be bold. Ask God "Why?" but be like David and quickly return to the firm foundation of identity. It is God's identity for you that makes it possible to live out this life as the victor that He has made possible for you today.
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