Thoughts
that have come from various quotes taken from the book, "Victor - Breaking
Free From a Victim Based Society" by John H. Hovis. Click here to link directly to
the audio file.
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"Coping mechanisms can be the foundation for addictions that come to rule our life. It doesn’t always have to be drugs or alcohol that we turn to for relief of the pain inside, and our coping mechanisms don’t necessarily have to be seen as bad things to the outside world."
As quoted from the book "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim-Based Society" by John H. Hovis Page 61.
Ever give much thought to the issue of coping mechanisms? Most of us don't, and why should we? Coping mechanisms aren't something that we really pay much attention to unless our way of coping with life leaves us in a place where what we are doing is somehow detrimental to us or those around us.
For example that glass of wine you have every evening to help cope with the stress of the day is no big deal until such time that several glasses later coping just isn't happening. It is when we find that we have to step up our strategies for coping that we flirt with disaster. As was said earlier, coping mechanisms can be the foundations for addictions when the things of this world take us into greater and greater feelings of loss and victimization.
I want us to think about the issue of coping in an entirely different light. You see, coping is about surviving. In other words, coping is what we do to try and fend off feelings of frustration, or sadness or unease that might come when we are in a situation that does not rise up to the expectations we might have had for our life. Coping, for the vast majority of us, is about just getting by.
I hope you don't think I am judging you in any way for having coping mechanisms. I'm not. If I were I'd be the biggest hypocrite in the world since I have relied on a host of coping mechanisms in the past, and to be completely honest, have a few that I lean on right now to survive in my world. Please stick with me a bit and let's see if there isn't something we all can learn about coping in this life.
So, the definition of coping I'd like us to consider is all about surviving - doing what we have to do to get by given our current life's circumstances. I don't know about you but when I was a child the possibility of having to just get by wasn't even a remote possibility when I dreamt of my future. I'm willing to bet they weren't part of your dreams either. Yet, here we are learning how to cope. What went wrong?
I believe that the fact that our dreams have been slow in coming or have passed us by altogether is what went wrong. We cope because we have to face the cold, hard facts that our dreams might be nothing more than a figment of our imagination. Surviving is all some of us has to look forward to and our coping mechanisms are all we have to survive.
Just like my dreams didn't include surviving when it came to my future, I don't believe God's dreams included coping either. I believe God dreamed that we would thrive, not just survive. Take a look at today's reading to see what I mean.
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10 (NASB)
I so wish that the word abundant meant that all of my personal dreams will come true. Unfortunately it doesn't. But, I do believe that word means that, even in the bad times, God made us for more than just coping. His plan for us is to thrive. I believe we put ourselves in the best position of making that happen when we believe in and operate from the power of our identity as a victor even when the world does all it can to make us a victim.
I really want my life to be different today, don't you? I want more than to survive - I want to thrive. Sure I might need to weed out some coping mechanisms along this path to thriving but who cares? I want today to be coping empty and thriving full! I think it can as I throw off the victim thinking ways of someone who just copes and put on the identity of the victor God has made me to be. May your day be filled with the joy of thriving even when your circumstances work to make your day all about just surviving.
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"Coping mechanisms can be the foundation for addictions that come to rule our life. It doesn’t always have to be drugs or alcohol that we turn to for relief of the pain inside, and our coping mechanisms don’t necessarily have to be seen as bad things to the outside world."
As quoted from the book "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim-Based Society" by John H. Hovis Page 61.
Ever give much thought to the issue of coping mechanisms? Most of us don't, and why should we? Coping mechanisms aren't something that we really pay much attention to unless our way of coping with life leaves us in a place where what we are doing is somehow detrimental to us or those around us.
For example that glass of wine you have every evening to help cope with the stress of the day is no big deal until such time that several glasses later coping just isn't happening. It is when we find that we have to step up our strategies for coping that we flirt with disaster. As was said earlier, coping mechanisms can be the foundations for addictions when the things of this world take us into greater and greater feelings of loss and victimization.
I want us to think about the issue of coping in an entirely different light. You see, coping is about surviving. In other words, coping is what we do to try and fend off feelings of frustration, or sadness or unease that might come when we are in a situation that does not rise up to the expectations we might have had for our life. Coping, for the vast majority of us, is about just getting by.
I hope you don't think I am judging you in any way for having coping mechanisms. I'm not. If I were I'd be the biggest hypocrite in the world since I have relied on a host of coping mechanisms in the past, and to be completely honest, have a few that I lean on right now to survive in my world. Please stick with me a bit and let's see if there isn't something we all can learn about coping in this life.
So, the definition of coping I'd like us to consider is all about surviving - doing what we have to do to get by given our current life's circumstances. I don't know about you but when I was a child the possibility of having to just get by wasn't even a remote possibility when I dreamt of my future. I'm willing to bet they weren't part of your dreams either. Yet, here we are learning how to cope. What went wrong?
I believe that the fact that our dreams have been slow in coming or have passed us by altogether is what went wrong. We cope because we have to face the cold, hard facts that our dreams might be nothing more than a figment of our imagination. Surviving is all some of us has to look forward to and our coping mechanisms are all we have to survive.
Just like my dreams didn't include surviving when it came to my future, I don't believe God's dreams included coping either. I believe God dreamed that we would thrive, not just survive. Take a look at today's reading to see what I mean.
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10 (NASB)
I so wish that the word abundant meant that all of my personal dreams will come true. Unfortunately it doesn't. But, I do believe that word means that, even in the bad times, God made us for more than just coping. His plan for us is to thrive. I believe we put ourselves in the best position of making that happen when we believe in and operate from the power of our identity as a victor even when the world does all it can to make us a victim.
I really want my life to be different today, don't you? I want more than to survive - I want to thrive. Sure I might need to weed out some coping mechanisms along this path to thriving but who cares? I want today to be coping empty and thriving full! I think it can as I throw off the victim thinking ways of someone who just copes and put on the identity of the victor God has made me to be. May your day be filled with the joy of thriving even when your circumstances work to make your day all about just surviving.
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