Thoughts
that have come from various quotes taken from the book, "Victor - Breaking
Free From a Victim Based Society" by John H. Hovis. Click here to link directly to
the audio file.
**********
"If I am entitled to something and that thing is somehow not fully provided there is nothing I can feel but offense, and I inevitably see myself as a victim."
As quoted from the book "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim-Based Society" by John H. Hovis Page 200.
The dictionary defines the word "entitlement" as the belief that one is deserving of or due certain privileges. With that definition in place it is easy to see how victim thinking can result when those things we feel entitled to don't happen in the timing or the way we demand. There is little that challenges the lifestyle of victor more than holding onto the belief that we are entitled in one way or another for anything in this life.
The definition of entitlement has a word that the victor needs to pay attention to in their lives. That word is deserving. Victim thinking is quick to happen when we believe that we deserve anything. When we find ourselves in a place where we think we deserve something what is actually happening is that we are comparing ourselves to someone else. Think about it. If you feel you deserve that new car aren't you actually saying that you have performed in one way or another better or more completely than others? Deserving speaks of reward. If you feel deserving aren't you really saying you are better than the others in your life and that you are entitled to being awarded for being better?
Look there is nothing wrong with being rewarded for a job well done. Rewards are such a sweet prize for us all. It is when we turn the corner to where we feel deserving that the victor stands the best chance of falling into victim thinking. Worse than that, victim thinking over issues of entitlement create victimizers when we fail to get what we believe we so completely deserve.
Again, this way of thinking isn't in any way to make us feel guilty about good things happening to us. If God is a loving Father then how could he be against good things happening to his children? The problem with being entitled and acting out of a place of feeling deserving is that it is so easy to cross the line from an appreciative child to a demanding brat. This is particularly the case when we see others receiving things that we might feel we deserve. It goes back to that comparison thing.
Not much pushes my buttons more than when I see people who, in my opinion, have expended much less effort and sacrificed less than I have end up getting more than me in return. Hear the victim thinking undertones in that last statement? It is when I allow myself the opportunity to compare myself to others when trouble is sure to follow. Comparison often leads me to offence when the issue of entitlement is concerned.
Comparing ourselves to others, when it leads to offence, closes the door on our ability to hear from others and from god himself. Here's a question I've begun asking myself when entitlement starts to take me down the road to compare myself to others, "Why would I ever want to be like someone else?" Yes, there might be some the goodies in that person's life that I might be jealous of but do I really want to be like that person? To take it a bit further, do I really want to be like any other person in this world? I know the messiness in my life but have no idea of the hidden messes in that other person's world. When it comes to the choice between the mess in my life vs the mess in someone else's, the devil you know is so much better than the devil you don't know.
So, the reality is that there isn't anyone in this world I should let the issue of comparison to get me into potential victim thinking ways. When it come to god, however, now there's someone maybe I would benefit from comparing my life to. Better stated, God is the perfect model for me to structure my life after. Bad news is that if I choose to compare my life after God then the issue of entitlement take a significant turn.
As was said earlier, when we say we deserve something we're actually implying that we have done something of merit that should be rewarded. Sure we all do great things in this world but, when compared to a perfect god do those things ever put us in a position of deserving reward from him? When compared to a perfect, all powerful, all knowing god, how can we think that our efforts, our lifestyle, or our abilities can ever rise to the level where we would deserve anything?
If you run into a situation where the feeling of entitlement starts to make you think you deserve something good in your life don't let that thought take control. Also, don't feel guilty for having that thought. Instead of letting those feelings linger unchallenged in your life and cause offence, think of how perfect God is and how imperfect you! Then remember how much He loves you. You are his beloved child.
Don't let entitlement put you on the slippery slope towards victim thinking. Ponder the thoughts above and let them put you in the best position to live the life of a victor God wants so much for you to have today.
**********
"If I am entitled to something and that thing is somehow not fully provided there is nothing I can feel but offense, and I inevitably see myself as a victim."
As quoted from the book "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim-Based Society" by John H. Hovis Page 200.
The dictionary defines the word "entitlement" as the belief that one is deserving of or due certain privileges. With that definition in place it is easy to see how victim thinking can result when those things we feel entitled to don't happen in the timing or the way we demand. There is little that challenges the lifestyle of victor more than holding onto the belief that we are entitled in one way or another for anything in this life.
The definition of entitlement has a word that the victor needs to pay attention to in their lives. That word is deserving. Victim thinking is quick to happen when we believe that we deserve anything. When we find ourselves in a place where we think we deserve something what is actually happening is that we are comparing ourselves to someone else. Think about it. If you feel you deserve that new car aren't you actually saying that you have performed in one way or another better or more completely than others? Deserving speaks of reward. If you feel deserving aren't you really saying you are better than the others in your life and that you are entitled to being awarded for being better?
Look there is nothing wrong with being rewarded for a job well done. Rewards are such a sweet prize for us all. It is when we turn the corner to where we feel deserving that the victor stands the best chance of falling into victim thinking. Worse than that, victim thinking over issues of entitlement create victimizers when we fail to get what we believe we so completely deserve.
Again, this way of thinking isn't in any way to make us feel guilty about good things happening to us. If God is a loving Father then how could he be against good things happening to his children? The problem with being entitled and acting out of a place of feeling deserving is that it is so easy to cross the line from an appreciative child to a demanding brat. This is particularly the case when we see others receiving things that we might feel we deserve. It goes back to that comparison thing.
Not much pushes my buttons more than when I see people who, in my opinion, have expended much less effort and sacrificed less than I have end up getting more than me in return. Hear the victim thinking undertones in that last statement? It is when I allow myself the opportunity to compare myself to others when trouble is sure to follow. Comparison often leads me to offence when the issue of entitlement is concerned.
Comparing ourselves to others, when it leads to offence, closes the door on our ability to hear from others and from god himself. Here's a question I've begun asking myself when entitlement starts to take me down the road to compare myself to others, "Why would I ever want to be like someone else?" Yes, there might be some the goodies in that person's life that I might be jealous of but do I really want to be like that person? To take it a bit further, do I really want to be like any other person in this world? I know the messiness in my life but have no idea of the hidden messes in that other person's world. When it comes to the choice between the mess in my life vs the mess in someone else's, the devil you know is so much better than the devil you don't know.
So, the reality is that there isn't anyone in this world I should let the issue of comparison to get me into potential victim thinking ways. When it come to god, however, now there's someone maybe I would benefit from comparing my life to. Better stated, God is the perfect model for me to structure my life after. Bad news is that if I choose to compare my life after God then the issue of entitlement take a significant turn.
As was said earlier, when we say we deserve something we're actually implying that we have done something of merit that should be rewarded. Sure we all do great things in this world but, when compared to a perfect god do those things ever put us in a position of deserving reward from him? When compared to a perfect, all powerful, all knowing god, how can we think that our efforts, our lifestyle, or our abilities can ever rise to the level where we would deserve anything?
If you run into a situation where the feeling of entitlement starts to make you think you deserve something good in your life don't let that thought take control. Also, don't feel guilty for having that thought. Instead of letting those feelings linger unchallenged in your life and cause offence, think of how perfect God is and how imperfect you! Then remember how much He loves you. You are his beloved child.
Don't let entitlement put you on the slippery slope towards victim thinking. Ponder the thoughts above and let them put you in the best position to live the life of a victor God wants so much for you to have today.
No comments:
Post a Comment