Thoughts
that have come from various quotes taken from the book, "Victor - Breaking
Free From a Victim Based Society" by John H. Hovis. Click here to link directly to
the audio file.
**********
"Shame affects our identity…"
As quoted from the book "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim-Based Society" by John H. Hovis Page 110.
I've often found that I confuse the definition and feelings surrounding the words guilt and shame. For the victor, misapplying what guilt and shame means in our life can have detrimental consequences when it comes to the effects of victim thinking.
I've had it explained to me this way. Guilt is that feeling we get when we know we have done something incorrect. Shame is believing that our identity is shaped by that bad thing that we did. Guilt is about what we did, shame is about who we are. We need to fully understand the importance when it comes to the distinction between guilt and shame if we stand any chance of fending off victim thinking in our lives.
When it comes to guilt, I'm of the opinion that, in moderation, guilt isn't necessarily a bad thing. Sure we can use guilt as a tool to try to manipulate other people and that is wrong! When guilt is used as a tool relationships suffer greatly.
When I come face to face with the reality that I may have done something where guilt might be appropriate, not wanting guilt in my life is sometimes what helps me to strive to not do that thing again in the future. Guilt can be a powerful personal motivational tool when properly applied in the life of a victor.
Shame, on the other hand, is something that victors simply can't stand to remain in their lives for long. Shame speaks to the fact that whatever I did that created the feeling of guilt in the first place is a picture of who I am. Anything temporary, good or bad, that we use to help define our identity makes it that much harder for us to stay out of victim thinking. Shame is in direct conflict to the identity of the victor when challenging times makes us do things that bring guilt into our existence.
Here's what the bible says about shame in our lives.
Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. Hebrews 12:2 (The Message)
God knew that we were not created to endure anything that may come against our identity particularly the ravages that can come with the feelings of shame. Jesus endured the shame of hanging on the cross even though he did nothing to deserve to be there. He did this so that our identities could be assured, we are children of God and therefore victors because of Jesus' work on the cross for us.
For that reason, we've been given a gift of being able to allow shame to not be a part of who we are. It truly is our choice! We can either choose to wallow in the identity crushing pain of shame or step into that place of honor, like Jesus did, and live this life as the victor God created us to be.
How did Jesus choose to endure that shame that was wrongly put on Him? Our reading says He knew who He was because He knew where He was going. He didn't lose sight. That's our charge as well - don't lose sight!
What are you going to choose today? If you choose shame, victim thinking is going to be part of the burdensome feeling of being trapped in the wrong identity. By choosing to turn away from shame you set yourself up for the best chance of letting your true identity, that of the victor, to shine in your life. Remember today who you are and where you are headed. Choose the freedom of an identity bought for you on the cross. Choose to reject the identity crushing burdens of shame and be free living the life of a victor.
**********
"Shame affects our identity…"
As quoted from the book "Victor - Breaking Free From a Victim-Based Society" by John H. Hovis Page 110.
I've often found that I confuse the definition and feelings surrounding the words guilt and shame. For the victor, misapplying what guilt and shame means in our life can have detrimental consequences when it comes to the effects of victim thinking.
I've had it explained to me this way. Guilt is that feeling we get when we know we have done something incorrect. Shame is believing that our identity is shaped by that bad thing that we did. Guilt is about what we did, shame is about who we are. We need to fully understand the importance when it comes to the distinction between guilt and shame if we stand any chance of fending off victim thinking in our lives.
When it comes to guilt, I'm of the opinion that, in moderation, guilt isn't necessarily a bad thing. Sure we can use guilt as a tool to try to manipulate other people and that is wrong! When guilt is used as a tool relationships suffer greatly.
When I come face to face with the reality that I may have done something where guilt might be appropriate, not wanting guilt in my life is sometimes what helps me to strive to not do that thing again in the future. Guilt can be a powerful personal motivational tool when properly applied in the life of a victor.
Shame, on the other hand, is something that victors simply can't stand to remain in their lives for long. Shame speaks to the fact that whatever I did that created the feeling of guilt in the first place is a picture of who I am. Anything temporary, good or bad, that we use to help define our identity makes it that much harder for us to stay out of victim thinking. Shame is in direct conflict to the identity of the victor when challenging times makes us do things that bring guilt into our existence.
Here's what the bible says about shame in our lives.
Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. Hebrews 12:2 (The Message)
God knew that we were not created to endure anything that may come against our identity particularly the ravages that can come with the feelings of shame. Jesus endured the shame of hanging on the cross even though he did nothing to deserve to be there. He did this so that our identities could be assured, we are children of God and therefore victors because of Jesus' work on the cross for us.
For that reason, we've been given a gift of being able to allow shame to not be a part of who we are. It truly is our choice! We can either choose to wallow in the identity crushing pain of shame or step into that place of honor, like Jesus did, and live this life as the victor God created us to be.
How did Jesus choose to endure that shame that was wrongly put on Him? Our reading says He knew who He was because He knew where He was going. He didn't lose sight. That's our charge as well - don't lose sight!
What are you going to choose today? If you choose shame, victim thinking is going to be part of the burdensome feeling of being trapped in the wrong identity. By choosing to turn away from shame you set yourself up for the best chance of letting your true identity, that of the victor, to shine in your life. Remember today who you are and where you are headed. Choose the freedom of an identity bought for you on the cross. Choose to reject the identity crushing burdens of shame and be free living the life of a victor.
No comments:
Post a Comment